How to help a child control his/her agg
Parenting

How to help a child control his/her aggression?

Best guide on handling child’s aggression starting early in childhood.

Aggressive children are big concern for parents, caregivers and educators no doubt about it but, how to help this children control aggression matter most’ which is often a challenge to many guardians out there. However, don’t worry I got you covered herein this article, read on to know what you need to do to help a child control his/her aggression.

In the words of Margaret J. Wheatley, “Aggression only moves in one direction, it creates more aggression”. Aggression is not only a force that is destructive in nature for adult only but it is a seed if not tamed in young children, could grow into a fully watered plant. Its negative impact will be just like a small fire could set the society ablaze if not controlled early.

Aggression meaning

Aggression as defined by the English dictionary, “is the practice or habit of launching attacks; an hostile or destructive behavior or actions. The Webster dictionary has it definition as an hostile, injurious or destructive behavior or outlook especially when caused by frustration.

Aggression as described in psychology

In psychology, “aggression refers to a range of behavior that can result in both physical and psychological harm to yourself, others or objects in the environment” meaning an aggressive person is prone to insecurity.

Aggression in children

Young children are children within the age range 3years to age 8 years. This stage evolve about their physical, emotional, as well as cognitive development and acceptance by family and friends. It is competitive but yet fundamental stage as thus, focus on transition which can either leads to trauma (that can last forever) or a safe and healthy foundation for them to thrive positively on for the rest of their life time.

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This stage forms the basis of childhood experiences which include: mistake, correction, severe punishment for some children, solid academic layout, as well as emulating characters visible to them. Young children are carefree unlike adult who are aware of the consequences of every action they make.

Aggression in young children don’t just happen but are caused by factors which could be as a result of a floppy and faulty background, societal impact, character imitation of favorite cartoon network and lots more.

Oftentimes, children who grew up in a rigid environment like the cantonment or who undergo rigid sanctioning or a child who grew up in an authoritative setting or home has a higher tendency of being aggressive based on the setting he is familiar with.

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Causes of aggression in children?

Aggression for most children are caused by diverse underlying factors, although aggression might be a general term but for different children, it’s root cause are different in nature. Below are few root causes of aggression in children.

  1. Violence at home

The home which house the family, is the first stage of socialization for every child. Most children become so aggressive and adamant as a result of the insecurities and violence from home and such violence might be from parent exchanging abusive words, hitting, bullying among siblings, maltreatment by parent or among siblings.

  1. Lack or inadequate attention:

Young children, are mostly attention seekers and as a result of lack or inadequate attention giving to young children, frustration sets in and in most cases, if not properly managed could make a child aggressive in nature, such children experience what we call attention deficit hype activity disorder which is a developmental disorder in which a person has a persistent pattern of impulsiveness and attention.

  1. Bullying

Bullying is a major stressor for victim who have been bullied at some point in time as it is destructive and also negate a measure of growth that is required of young children. A child who is been victimized by a bully has all tendencies of been ruthless and aggressive at the point of revenge.

As much as external factor leads to aggression, it is important to know that internal factors extensively leads to aggression too. Children raised by aggressive parents has a highly tendencies of been aggressive as a result of pattern that is been modelled to them at home.

  1. Emotional imbalance

Children with emotional imbalance get angry easily which results to yelling, use of foul languages, they tend to be destructive in nature.

  1. Maltreatment

No children should be treated inferior or superior to another, as maltreatment or negligence could cause aggression and psychological defect in young children.

  1. Aggression due to oppositional defiant disorder

Young children with the “oppositional defiant disorder has tendencies of been aggressive, which is a childhood disorder characterized by an ongoing pattern of anger and disobedience, hostility and defiant behavior towards authority figures”.

Ways aggression is demonstrated in behaviours

Aggression is demonstrated in behavioral form with signs and actions which may include but not limited to inflicting pain on victims, destroying property, bullying, yelling, confrontation, use of abusive words, threatening victims self esteem, greediness or inability to share with others, tolerate others.
Aggression in young children can be curb, if adequate measures are taken promptly when aggressive behavior is noticed in a child.

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How to control your child aggression?

Frustration, cheating, oppression are other reasons why a child can become aggressive in order words the experience can be different at different age.

Ways you can handle child’s aggression starting early in childhood.

  1. Understand your child personality and triggers

Understanding your child personality and aggression triggers is as important as knowing the nature of what can make him/her angry. This implies parents active involvement in their child day in day out activities, spending time with them him/her and been observant of your child doings and behavior.

Triggers are events, experience or other stimulus that initiates a traumatic memory or action in a person. It is said that there is a reason for every action or inaction, it is therefore expected of parents, guardians to be on the watch in other to pinpoint what personality and what triggers certain action in their children.

  1. Practice forgiveness and love

Young children observe and imitate what they see, parents, guardians and other siblings do there you should make it a practice to forgive in love, say sorry, emulate this pattern of been quick to apologize and forgive others sincerely. By so doing your child will also live by this example.

  1. Anger management

Anger is a strong feeling of displeasure, hostility usually combined with an urge to harm. Make your child understand that anger is an emotion and it can be controlled rather than been controlled by emotions. Anger management is also the ability for a person to control his or her temperament without losing control of one’s emotions. Enlighten your child on how best to express himself/herself without been aggressive.

  1. Effective communication

One sign of aggression is yelling, Teach your child how to communicate and express themselves in a friendly manner. Emphasis that yelling or shouting while talking can trigger misunderstanding or make other around him/her feel uncomfortable. around him/her.

If you found out or noticed that a child tends to yell whenever he/she is talking with others, control, cautioned or correct with love. Go further to enlighten your child how talking to other should be done. Try also to address whoever your child mingles with who yells or shout often whenever they talk to stop doing so around your kid else he/she start imitating same thinking it best way of talking.

  1. Teach child tolerance and empathy

The impact of tolerance and empathy can not be underestimated, teach your child to respect and tolerate others irrespective of whether they are family or not. Your child should also be taught how to show empathy to others as such will foster strong relationship and respect.

  1. Sensor what your child watch via television, video, computer phones and games

Children are quick to imitate their favorite super model and practice what they watch on their favorite show which could be harmful and violent therefore try your best and make sure you set control on the type of program your child watch.

It is noteworthy to say that parents, guardians and the society has a vital role to play in handling aggression in young children. Alyson Schafer says, “Children need to learn that using aggression is not the best way to interact, complaint or resolve issues.

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More so, If you use anger as a means to get your child to listen or behave, “stop immediately”. You are modelling this behavior and he is imitating you and such will worsening the situation. Be good models for a child to follow.

I am glad you comes this far. To share your opinion with us’ please use the comment box below. Also click follow to stay abreast of our subsequent publications. Thanks for reading.

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